Day 13

This 19:th confessional is a sad one. I just want to mention that most likely none of the rest confessionals I'll send in will be short. There's just so much happening, and the scenario's constantly changing. Remember Genius Corp.? Well, that alliance didn't last longer than a day. Scott's loyalty was never with Gavin, but with Emma. The two of them betrayed him tonight, and voted for him instead of Pedro. Pedro was going to vote with them too, but he sent in his vote too early. The revote tonight wasn't even supposed to happen. Emma and Scott told Gavin yesterday that he had too dangerous bonds with people, and decided to betray him. The whole day Heather, Josh and Gavin (I'll explain it soon), have tried to convince them to change their votes, but only Brayden will vote for Pedro. Emma is afraid of being called flipper, so she won't change her vote, and Scott's the big backstabber himself, so yeah. Anyway, help came to Gavin from where he least expected it - Corvo. Corvo wants to keep Gavin in the game, because of reasons I can't fully understand. They also want Pedro out. Apparantly Pedro, Heather, Evan, Konrad and Josh had an alliance since day 1, but it was broken when Evan was voted out. Evan apparantly thought of himself as better than the others, and was rude to them too. That makes me understand better why they voted him out, though the Evan I knew was not like that, and that's the Evan I carry with me throughout this game. Other than Evan I also carry with me Konrad, Reid, parts of Rhea and now Gavin too. I feel like with them at my side, I can do anything! People shouldn't ally with me at all though. Everyone who does gets sent home. And also, I just got killed by an old lady who can't walk in another ORG... Great day, right? Back to the topic. I've talked a lot to Josh today, since Gavin basically made us two his apprentices. Corvo's apparantly a very unified tribe, much because they haven't lost a challenge yet, except from the first one. Alto on the other hand, is much more split than I originally thought. Brayden's the only one trustable there, according to Gavin, and that's probably true. I need to switch target completely now. Is Corvo or Alto the greater threat? And what happens if we lose next time? Am I really as safe as I think? When's the right time to play my Idol? Genius Corp. was a huge mistake. It revealed so much of my game to Scott and therefor also to Emma. I'm just glad Gavin and I kept talking in PMs as much as we did. Scott could've known really horrible things by now... I also suspect Scott or Emma to have an Idol. I can't be sure yet though... And I'll probably have to align with Josh and Heather in the future. I really need to come up with a way to keep Zaranha going somehow though. Voting out Emma and Scott should be fairly easy, with Corvo included, and that would leave us with 6 Corvos and 5 others. If Violet somehow self-votes sometime, we might be able to send her home. And once Corvo's down at 3, we could take out Pedro and Brayden with them, only to take them out and go out victorious ourselves! That probably won't work at all though, since other people also have plans apparantly. Oh well, we'll just have to see what happens I guess! Still a bit too shocked over my death that just happened, tbh. I've never died before, and I was just about to kill the woman who killed me too -_-

Anyway, I'll end this confessional here. Gavin, this confessional is for you, and when we play in LaGrossa tomorrow I hope it goes better for you! It feels hard to say this, but I shall say it anyway: this is becoming the best sesason ever!


20 confessionals! Looks like Gavin still went out ;( Josh and I have grew closer, and his close allies are Heather, and possibly Tyler. More would've been better, but it's a decent number. I've also talked to Emma a bit, and she's acting like normal. The Plaza is starting to become very obsolete though tbh. Most Idols were probably found after the third Plaza, and yet we still use it! Glad that we won't have more than possibly one more Plaza tbh. We gave our clue to Pedro, because, to quote Laure; "Zebra tribe or whatever the hell we're called is giving it to Pedro as a 'sorry your dick'd face tribe almost voted you out, and sorry about that whole Reed thing, but ya know what can you do' present". And Pedro apparantly has a crush on her too, another reason she wants to give our clue to him. Oh, and Joan is so lost this season tbh. Like Mitch said: "Well to be honest, Joan doesn't even know what season this is, so I wouldn't take his words too seriously". Mitch said that after I quoted Joan in my group chat with Josh and the hosts; "We have a plan for the swaps and merge so don't call me biased". Joan in his turn, said that as a reply to Laure, claiming Joan to be wanting to Matsing us. Laure is so funny btw, and really holds up the mood in our failed tribe. She didn't like me "researching" her (looking through old confessionals from Indonesia), so she decided to not send in any more confessionals for the season. That's something a doubt she'll do, but it's just an example of her light and fun side. Josh and I have an official alliance now too, one that Gavin is part of and made just as he was voted out. I named it "The Avengers of Gavin", and it's exactly what our alliance is. This hurts so much to say, but I will try my best from now on to vote Emma out before the merge. Scott can be voted out later, but Emma's only goal this season is to break the Côte curse. If we get on the same tribe after a potential swap, I will use my Idol (if neccessary) to get her out. Our season is about to be outclassed soon though, as Rome's starting in five days. I just hope we can still shine bright and keep our Cape Verde head high! NPC haven't said anything at all today, which is not so good, since we really need to win the next Immunity Challenge, but hopefully that means Laure'll keep me in this game over him, since I really don't want to use my Idol on something like that. The whole day's been extremely calm though, and even though I am in 3 ORGs atm, with a fourth starting in just a week, I feel good about everything. The holidays end in three days' time, but until then I'll try to have as much fun as possible! This is a short confessional compared to the last few ones, but Gavin's last words will keep me strong. He shared them to me and Josh just before he left, and they were awesome! Gavin, we will avenge you! Your impact on this game shall be everlasting! This is becoming the best season ever!


Day 14

So i may be going...

So i may be going....

three days before alto mira lost

My heart will go on part 1

My heart will go on part 1

when gavin got voted off

Drag them Slay them Get them My heart goes on part 2

Drag them Slay them Get them My heart goes on part 2

a day after gavin got voted off/


MY ASS WAS SAVED! But yeah, it was a close call.. As I said, Gavin could come after me before I did anything, and I'm just glad I have some buds here that are more loyal to me than him...


Day 15

I wish I could kill Brayden and Gavin together. Brayden is useless, and we can't sit him out, and I doubt he is going to put any effort in this challenge. If Gavin had at least kept our tribe's plan, he'd still be here doing this challenge and Brayden would be gone, because that's what he deserved.


Can this guy run? I honestly doubt it!


21 confessionals means 3 weeks since the start of this thing! I've lost friends and I've earned new ones, but the game still is far from over. Organization XIII has today been full of love confessionals. Pedro's been going on and on about how much he loves Laure, and even though it's kind of funny, it's starting to become boring now. Joan also posted some Valentine Cards, CV inspired! The first was Rhea - "I'd emerge from the dead just to be with you". The second was Emma - "When I saw you were in my tribe I was like "What the fuck is dis" cause you are hot". The third and final he posted (he planned on making one for every contestant though) was Heather - "I made an hour long confessional talking about how much I love you". When I mentioned that reveals Heather to be the one making those long confessionals he's always talking about, he realised he'd screwed up again. Pretty much everyone agrees on one thing though - hating the challenge. QWOP is infamous, and nobody wants to play it. Joan said he wanted to have a live challenge instead, but as usual nobody listens to Joan. I can't say I like how the hosts wait a whole day I have free with posting the challenge, and post it just before I'm about to sleep since I'm travelling back home the whole day tomorrow -_- Zaranha can't lose again though. I told NPC and Laure that I think 100 meters each should be sufficient (we'll probably need about just over that though), and I also mentioned that if we lost and I had the worst score, I wanted to be voted off. If that happens I'll have to do a hard thing though - play my Idol and vote one of them out. Laure would be the best, as she's the greatest threat, but NPC's so nice and as it's said - the nicest people are the most dangerous ones. I also think I can trust Laure more later on. She hasn't betrayed anyone yet - NPC's betrayed Reid. Speaking about Reid, Gavin gave me a nice piece of information today. Apparantly a Ponderosa chat exists, named (and I'm not joking): "Outcast Waiting Room - NOTICE: Please take a number at the door. When your number appears on the screen, please re-enter the game area and proceed to wreck havoc upon the games of your peers. Thank you, and have a nice day". Since Konrad's back, it's mostly him, Reid, Joan and Gavin who talks. It sounds pretty great to be honest, and somehow it makes me stronger. I really want to win this game now, and I actually start to think I can make it. The thought of my fallen comrades will only make the Avengers of Gavin stronger and better. Speaking of which, I've talked a lot to Josh today. He still seems somewhat fishy, but I trust him more than I trust most pepole in this game. As you may know I'm reading through all old episodes and confessionals, and today Szymon finally uploaded the second half of Kamchatka's confessionals, and it was really fun to read through them all! Something stroke me as I did read through them though - CV is almost starting to become a Kamchatka 2.0. Sure, Corvo's not as great as Uspekh and Alto and Zaranha may split Pobeda and Slava's win/loss, but I realised I don't want a Kamchatka situation to happen. I do not want to be an Ivan, fighting in a tribe consisting mostly of Corvos. Gavin told me today to vote out Scott at first, best chance, since he's a huge threat later on, but do I really want Corvo to win automatically? I'm not quite sure yet, but putting myself before others is not something I always do. Also, I'm an Avenger of Gavin, right? I owe it to him to vote out Scott. Betraying Zaranha is also something I'm not sure I'd be able to do, but I really want to make it this season, and with my three greatest threats gone already I'm highest on my list - and that's not good. We really need to win this challenge - it's everything or nothing. Sigh... If only I wasn't travelling during this specific challenge. And the Idol is more of a curse than a blessing, really. You feel bad if you flush it or go home with it, if you tell people about it you're a threat, and most of all you never want to have to use it. Oh no, just noticed how the text screwed up when I copy/pasted the Ponderosa chat title. Sigh. Not much is going good for me today. Also, I start to think an outcast twist is actually happening. Why? Well, we're losing people way too fast at this rate for the 39 days to happen, though that could be fixed later on. What really's making me suspect it is that the word outcasts even is mentioned in the Ponderosa chat title! Anyway, I don't have much more to say, and I don't want to be a Heather, right Joan? ;)

Wrapping this up with some by now familiar words, used for the last time: this is becoming the best season ever!


Day 13

"Literally mad right now. I can not believe that Scott and Emma would flip their vote on me at tribal. Actually, I can believe Scott not telling me but Emma? I was shocked. She did apologize and said she would owe me one. She seemed to feel really bad but I don't know. I feel like Scott was the mastermind behind all this. I want him gone SO bad. But, I have to bite my tongue and continue on. But be warned Scott, The Monster is Coming."

"After last night, I think I can still trust Emma. I hope. And now Pedro has clues to the HII. Thanks Zaranha:

– But after speaking to him, we apologized for voting for each other then he said he doesn't want the paranoia of the idol. That is a bunch of bull if you ask me."

Day 14 "I really had to cool down. I'd admit I was mad but I can't hold a grudge so it is just time for me to do my best in this immunity challenge and continue with the game."

"I hate sitting out for immunity so much. But maybe that will help me in a merge situation because then I can say 'I suck at challenges, why vote me out?'"

"If we merge at 12 we have to team up with Zaranha. After tonight, we will have 4, they will have 2 and Corvo still has 6. We are pretty much screwed if Corvo gets an advantage over us if we don't merge at 12.", Brayden

I'm in a really good mood right now! Corvo just BARELY won first place in our fifth straight competition and I think everyone on our tribe is pretty happy about it!

I do feel a little bad, however. Lindsay wanted to compete in this competition, but not everyone on our tribe wanted that. I think everyone has noticed that Heather and I have competed in every single competition and everyone probably has different attitudes about that. Competing in every competition not only puts a target on our backs from the other tribes, but I think it might annoy some of the members on our tribe. Lindsay hasn't been well and because of that she's missed out on a lot of challenges. I can't see it being fun for her to not be doing anything in the game and nobody likes just watching others play. I think I'm gonna try to talk to her and make sure she knows she's valuable to our group and reassure her that she's important, because if she feels like she's on the outs she's more likely to swap sides.

As we move towards the merge, I'm trying to gradually make some posts in the "one world" chat with all castaways, because when we move away from the tribe part of the game I wanna make sure people see me as approachable and possibly see me as an asset to their games. I know people see me as a tough competitor, but they might use me as a shield to keep the target from being placed on their back.

If I had to choose the castaway I'd most like to work with from Alto Mira, I would pick Pedro. He looks like he's having a lot of fun in this game and he's a big personality. He was close to being voted off last tribal, so I feel that he could have a target placed on his back for maybe being too friendly with people from other tribes. If he and I worked together we could help protect each other from being singled out as the big threats of the game. From Zaranha I would pick Laure. She has a target on her back for being a successful returning player. Not only that, but if what I've heard is true she isn't a big fan of the Alto Mira tribe. I think her experience would definitely make her a useful ally, and just like in the case with Pedro, we could help distribute our targets between ourselves.

I can't wait to see what's in store for the rest of the game!


Week 4, confessional number 22! So, not much's happened today, and I've travelled most time of the day, so this confessional will be extremely short. We lost today, since everyone in the game that participated got a score between 100-101, except one person. Yep, you guessed it. Laure. She almost scored 10. Yep, 10. I'm in an alliance with her, kinda, but I want to do what's best for Zaranha. NPC said he'd vote Laure, but I'm not sure about him tbh... If only there was a way to know for sure! I will not play my Idol tonight though, if they not tell me outright they'll vote me off that is. More updates coming tomorrow! WHo knows? Maybe I'll only make one more confessional in this game before my final one... New week, meaning: this is close at being the best season ever!


23 confessionals is a whole lot! So yeah, not much's happened today. Or has it...? Actually, this TC is one of the most dramatic ones yet. I've probably been clueless before, but this one feels really dramatic and stuff. So, yesterday was a hard day for me to decide who to vote for. After a while NPC came up with the great idea to all self-vote, and have a rock draw. I've been thinking about it a whole day and night, literally, but eventually I decided rocks would be the perfect way to do it. I was going to give the Idol to Josh before sending in my vote, for safe keeping in case I wouldn't come back. After that luck would decide it all. If only that had been the case...

I always suspected NPC to be weak. The nicest are often the weakest and most afraid ones. That's why I set up a plan. I told everyone I'd sent in my vote, which I hadn't done of course, and then I waited. I had 2 hours' Kung Fu practise anyway, so it didn't really matter. When I came back, much later, I saw that NPC was finally on. So we spoke, and after a while he told me rocks were too risky. He wanted to stay, so since I had self-voted already and Laure's vote was unknown, he had voted for me. I thanked him for that, and I truly am thankful for it - NPC's always been the nice, but unfortunately weak, guy in our group. I immediately crossed out my "iel" on the parchment, and added "PC" instead. I also played my Idol. Luckily enough I was just going to give it to Josh when NPC sent me that message. So, I played the Idol (and PM:ed every host about it on FB, so that everyone'd know, desperate, yes, but I was desperate too). I also thanked NPC and said goodbye to everyone in the tribe chat. I also told NPC to keep Zaranha strong. If only he was the right man for the job. Don't get me wrong here, this decision was heart-wrecking for me, I just want to do what's best for the tribe. That, and one other thing. Last TC, Gavin was voted out. Gavin. THE Gavin. I promised him to avenge him, and once I got home I also started getting messages from Josh. He told me to not do rocks, and stay safe. He really wanted me left in the game, and I trust that guy. I probably could've gonne out today too, if Gavin had been here still. But now he's not, and I have to help him in the best way I can. And that, is to do my duty as an Avenger of Gavin. I have to follow his last wish, even if it's the last thing I do in this game. The swap/merge will be much harder without that Idol, but it feels good that it's gone too. And since Zaranha will probably cease to exist after this, it'd only be fitting to use the Idol in Zaranha's last Tribe Council, right? I'm a bit worried about Laure too, to be honest. Her teeth are apparantly damaged somehow, and she had to make an emergency surgery. She later said she didn't have to make the surgery though, so I don't know. I just hope I can trust her for the rest of this competition. She's been helpful so far, and she'd hopefully save me again. I know I'd save her for sure. Though I consider us almost totally even now. I saved her life in this game today by voting NPC instead of her, she did however save me from a pretty sure elimination. Most of all I hope we Zaranhans can stay friends even after this competition is over though. Even though I've betrayed people (NPC) and have been betrayed by people (Reid) and have seen people I trust getting voted out (Gavin) and disqualified (Konrad), I hope we all manage to stay friends after this. Gavin, Konrad and Reid I am all on good terms with right now - I just wonder if NPC'll feel the same...

And if you ever read this, Nathan (this is for Nathan only, but if you feel like you have to read, go on, I won't stop you) I can't ever say how sorry I am. If I could I'd go to you right now and tell you how you're going out, but I just can't! At least not until you've voted... Same name. That's what you've always been calling me. I know it feels wierd to speak to you like this, but we've been together for more than 20 days. That's quite a lot of time. This voting was harder than anything I could've imagined, and to think that your goodness and kindness were the things that ultimately got you out is just heartbreaking! I wrote this in my voting confessional too, but I'll say it here as well: I just hope that you can forgive me one day, and I really hope there's an Outcasts twist that'll bring you back.

With a heavy voice, he exclaimed it. He, who had been the nicest of them all, and whose journey stopped right before the mist, and the breaking point. He exclaimed the words, the words that would echoe throughout the ages, for eternity, until the end of the world. The words, that sounded: this is close at being the best season ever!