Day 37

So it's the final 4. I think this is where the game ends for me. The immunity challenge stinks... I don't even want to try because there is no way in hell where I'm gonna win this challenge, and nobody wants me in the end. The past two votes, I've surprisingly been able to reflect all votes and got Charlie to play his idol on me! But now, I kind of don't have much of a great plan. What I'm doing right now is trying to persuade Charlie and Dallas to vote for Des. While I get Des to vote for Dallas. And then i vote for Dallas too and it's a duel between Dallas and Des and I'm in the final 3. That's the best case scenario. The worse case scenario is that all of them are gonna betray me... and that's pretty much the most realistic scenario. So to recap, crazy votes, no way I'm gonna win the challenge, and I'm screwed. But if the end is gonna be like anything that has happened so far, then this is going to be one crazy finish... that's what she said... Sorry XD


I am in the worst possible position right now, and I don't want to be out here with any of these people. I'd skupin myself to get away from them all. I mean, they're all really great guys, and over the course of this adventure, I feel like we have become friends. But in the context of this game, I want to strangle them all.

Charlie is sketchy as all get out. I don't trust him for a second. He acts on impulse. He's unpredictable and with every passing day, that makes him more dangerous. He won't commit to taking me to the end, either, particularly with a choice to take Dallas, so he's dead to me right now. Unless he can truly be a tool to get me to the end.

Dallas is smug and arrogant and I would quite like to drop kick that smirking face all the way to Argentina. He is convinced he is going to the end, and I would so like to blindside him to just see him go down in flames. He says he'll take me to the end, but... I don't know if I trust that. Particularly since I voted for him last time.

And Jhet? Well, he's only here because of luck and the stupidity of others. He got through the first few Tribals because he won immunity at the opportune moment and because of Ash's idol. And he's only still around because of Khaptad's idiocy at the last vote. They tried to hand him the win, and by doing so, they've made it my best option to try to keep him around.

You see, I don't think I've got a chance to win the final immunity challenge. I'll still have only a phone for Internet, so if there's any kind of flash game, I'm gone. So I have to rely on the fact that whoever wins will take me. I firmly believe that Dallas and Charlie would take each other. So I need to take away that option. My best hope now is to force a tie-breaker, and hope that Dallas loses. Then, Charlie will be forced to take me to the end if he wins the last immunity. And I think I can rely on Jhet's hero edit - he can beat any of us, but I think he'd prefer to triumph over the greatest adversity and I'd give him a better run for his money than Charlie.

Right now, I'm a sitting duck. I could be easily eliminated at any turn. So I'm using every trick in the strategy playbook - and then some - to get myself to the end. So, fingers and toes and everything else is crossed in the hope that this goes the way I need it to.


Day 38

I'm going home tonight. There's no doubt about it. I tried really hard in immunity, but I just don't have the time to put together the video with all that's happening in my personal life right now. And that really sucks, because I know I could put together something really special otherwise. I'm not trying to make excuses. I'm just disappointed that I'm going to go out of the game like this: a complete and utter failure.

I had a strong alliance at the beginning of this game. We were supposed to go to the end together: Charley, Dallas and myself. Around the merge, I noticed them each growing more and more suspicious of each other - they confided their concerns in me, and I tried to settle their paranoia without outright telling them they were wrong for fear of damaging my own alliance with them. I thought I was managing it well at the time, but in hindsight, I clearly didn't make enough of an effort to reconcile the alliance, because it was their suspicion of each other that tore the alliance - and my game - to shreds. I blame them, but I also hold myself accountable for not spotting the signs early and fixing it.

And then I made two moves that backfired horribly. I ostracized myself by trying to tie the vote when Charley left. And then I took a gamble by tying the vote with Jhet. I still think that decision was my best option. I think Jhet would have taken me to the end, but Charlie definitely had no interest in going with me, and despite Dallas insisting he would have, I just don't believe him. Charlie is the perfect person to sit next to: he's arrogant and he thinks he played a better game than he did. Why would Dallas want to sit next to someone who, by his own admission, is more likable and had a strong social game? The only move I could make was to try to force a scenario at the Final Three where the others would be forced to take me if they won. I wanted to be next to Dallas and Jhet, but that was foiled, and then Jhet lost, so now...

Now, I'm going home. I hate that I fell so hard on my face right at the end. It's embarrassing and pathetic. I was *this* close to the end, but I couldn't tie the bow.

So good night, everybody.

Signed, The Failure


Day 39